Tuesday, November 6, 2012

I Dream of Love



Sometimes dreams are our brains way of expressing everyday stress and frustration. At other times, dreams enlighten and entertain. Then there are, what I like to call, healing dreams.
The dreams my autistic brain creates are...more real, than average. I believe one commonly used term is "vivid dreaming". The events and feelings I experience are just slightly less intense than every day life.
I have repeatedly had dreams where I am talking and hugging my sister who passed away. I love the discussions we "have", how it feels to hear her voice again, and the magical touch of her hand.
On more than one occassion, I have dreamt I put money in my pocket. Upon awaking, I actually searched for it and was quite dismayed to find "it was just a dream." I have awoken in pure terror when dream living one of my sons being lost. Likewise, I frequently dream that my Eldest is home and released from prison. Again, I happily, if ever so briefly, look for him and end up in tears because it is not reality.
In dreams, I feel strongly emotionally and physically.

The past couple weeks, I have had at least four-five different dreams with the same theme...someone, a boyfriend or girlfriend, loves me very, very much. The person who cares for me so deeply is always different. The common thread is that each love is very kind, sweet, caring, safe and happy...to be with me. I awaken feeling warm, smiling and with an inner feeling of...being loved.


Prior to two weekes ago, I fail to recall ever having a dream of this love and feeling magnitude. The sheer number of healing love dreams is beyond erratic or coincidental. Just today, I had one love dream with a twenty something, casually attractive and highly caring young man at night, in addition to having a nap dream with a thirty something sweet and beautiful woman television personality. I must add that the dreams are completely without a sexual component. They encompass nothing but deep caring and love.
I am very much enjoying these. I love the feeling in the dream, as well as the warm residue I experience upon awakening. Dreams can truly be healing.

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