As any parent knows, parent-teacher conferences are mandatory events to attend at least twice a year. Being a single parent with Asperger's, conferences have been proven to be a challenge that I have had had to modify.
Via my first disastrous, panic attack riddled attempt to attend conferences the normal, neurotypical way, I needed to find a way that works for me.
The typical conference setting is having all the teachers at individual tables scattered around a single, large, echoing room like the cafeteria or gymnasium. Parents are required to stand in line and wait for their turn to come and their child's teacher to be a available.
As I stood in line eyeing the length of the line, listening to the din of the crowd grow larger as I inched my way toward the room, I broke out in a sweat, couldn't stand still and felt compelled to bolt from the building.
With age comes wisdom.
This was my son's first year at a new middle school so bolting wasn't a doable option. I ran into the office, tears streaming down my face, in full stammer/stutter mode and asked the secretary for a room to calm down.
The secretary readily read my distress and ushered me to a small office whereby I blurted out that I was autistic with PTSD and I just couldn't do it (handle going to conferences in this format).
The secretary helped me decide on a different course of action. She said that she could get my son's report card from the gym and Then she would be able to set up times and dates whereby I could meet with the teachers individually away from the maddening crowd.
This Worked!
Whereas moments before I saw no options, no way to complete this mandatory task that I wanted to do, a solution arose from the ashes of my panic attack.
Thus, every parent-teacher conference these past two years I have gone to the office, spoke with the office manager or one of the assistants, and scheduled One-on-One conferences with each of my child's teachers!!
This works for me!
Sure, I go to the school 4 or 5 different days but the sensory stimuli, the difficulty of meeting new people that each talk and use words in unique ways, it is easier for me to handle.
I did inadvertently agree to meet three teachers, back-to-back in one day and needed to shutdown and nap the remainder of the day, however, next time I will schedule no more than two in a row.
I continue to learn how to manage being an Aspie mom navigating this crazy neurotypical world.
Via my first disastrous, panic attack riddled attempt to attend conferences the normal, neurotypical way, I needed to find a way that works for me.
The typical conference setting is having all the teachers at individual tables scattered around a single, large, echoing room like the cafeteria or gymnasium. Parents are required to stand in line and wait for their turn to come and their child's teacher to be a available.
As I stood in line eyeing the length of the line, listening to the din of the crowd grow larger as I inched my way toward the room, I broke out in a sweat, couldn't stand still and felt compelled to bolt from the building.
With age comes wisdom.
This was my son's first year at a new middle school so bolting wasn't a doable option. I ran into the office, tears streaming down my face, in full stammer/stutter mode and asked the secretary for a room to calm down.
The secretary readily read my distress and ushered me to a small office whereby I blurted out that I was autistic with PTSD and I just couldn't do it (handle going to conferences in this format).
The secretary helped me decide on a different course of action. She said that she could get my son's report card from the gym and Then she would be able to set up times and dates whereby I could meet with the teachers individually away from the maddening crowd.
This Worked!
Whereas moments before I saw no options, no way to complete this mandatory task that I wanted to do, a solution arose from the ashes of my panic attack.
Thus, every parent-teacher conference these past two years I have gone to the office, spoke with the office manager or one of the assistants, and scheduled One-on-One conferences with each of my child's teachers!!
This works for me!
Sure, I go to the school 4 or 5 different days but the sensory stimuli, the difficulty of meeting new people that each talk and use words in unique ways, it is easier for me to handle.
I did inadvertently agree to meet three teachers, back-to-back in one day and needed to shutdown and nap the remainder of the day, however, next time I will schedule no more than two in a row.
I continue to learn how to manage being an Aspie mom navigating this crazy neurotypical world.
