Socializing...Conversation and the Alien

On any given week I engage in a conversation, with someone other than a family member, on average five or six times. I am introverted by nature and don't go out very often.
Last week I ran into a friend of mine whom I hadn't seen in a few months. We played catch up and easily bantered back and forth. Once again, I noticed my Aspie trait of watching her lips move so that I would know when it was my turn to speak. When her lips stopped moving for a few seconds, then it was my turn.
Conversations do not come easily and watching lips is one of the tricks I have learned in order to carry on a normal conversation without interrupting at the wrong time.
When someone speaks to me, there is a...delay in my ability to process what is being said. It's as if...sentence A is a round red ball and it bounces in, hits one wall, then the next, and another and a nother and then hits the button of comprehension, which is way in the back, on the right.
Thus when someone is talking for ...say...a few minutes, I've got all these little balls bouncing to and fro and I am trying to decipher their meaning. The longer a person talks...the more confusing it becomes. Those balls take a long time to slow down enough so I can grab them and read what they say.
It is very common for me to get the full jest of a conversation the next day or even two or three days later.

One could say that I had very limited eye contact during chats, it is quite true, but I find it quite necessary in order to keep the flow of talking back and forth smooth.
Funny, I tend to identify people by the shape of their lips and teeth not by their face and eyes...because that is where I spend most of my time looking.

Another Reason I Go Non-Verbal..Voluntarily

There are times when I find myself in selective mutism...and i cannot get out. Looking back, there are also times that I voluntarily, with good reason go non-verbal.
One reason that I will not talk, at times, is my brain is miswired and if I go to say "good morning", even to someone that I normally say that to...my emotions will pour forth in a semi-violent and uncontrollable manner.
Sometimes, I am aware that the emotations are lurking directly below the surface and I know, I Know, that if I say a single word, any word at all, it needn't be about what is causing this emotional uproar, I will have an emotional break down immediately.

Been there, done that, Do Not like that.

It makes no sense from the outsiders point of view and I usually do not feel like explaining why that is taking place. (Most of the time, I seriously may not even know)
I tend to sing at home and frequently, when I start and get it going, the first couple of songs or so, I have to just let ...emotations express before I can get back to a semblance of order and enjoy my little singing venture. More often than not, that is simply what happens with this Aspie.
Verbalization is such a complexity and I am really just starting to understand, comprehend and be okay with my emotional expressions due to their erratic, unpredictable and often, uncontrollable nature.
There are definitely times, where I have to decide whether it is worth the embarrassing emotional display in order to speak and get a point across.
Yeah, for this Aspie, the emotional center is often directly tied to my verbal center.
In the informal and poorly funded study, where I observe the NTs, this is far from usual. Their verbal centers and emotional centers are definitely not as connected. They seem to keep emotations far from their lips, easily within its own compartment which they can access or not access at will, for the most part. Oh, to have such a grasp!

I feel like I have taken a lot of beating, much strife, from myself if not from others, regarding my verbalizations or lack thereof. Its kindof nice and reassuring to discover the whys and howcomes.
Verbalization...its complicated...quite