Prepare to enter the wild and wooly world of an adult with Aspergers Syndrome, a form of autism characterized by intellignce, quirks, social difficulties and downright strange and oddish behaviours.

People with Aspergers generally are high functioning in everyday life but have great difficulty connecting with others due to the inability to read faces, body language and subtle verbal clues. They also tend to take words literally and have a hard time multi-tasking.

Oversensitivity to touch (clothing has to be soft and often the tags removed), light (do not leave home without the sunglasses), sound (loud noises and noisey places are avoided), taste (many Aspies have quite a limited diet and are frequently very picky eaters) and smells makes the everyday existence more of a challenge.

Fasten your seatbelts and come on in...
To find out more about what Aspergers is..please check out my earliest blog entries

Saturday, July 7, 2012

The One Friend Theory...loneliness

Aspies highly value their friendships. To find someone with whom they can completely be themselves, to allow the walls, barriers and barricades to drop, is such a blessing, a relief.
The years, the nights spent in the thick fog of loneliness, praying and pleading for someone of worth to come along and hold out their hand.....an Aspie only needs one true friend for that entire realm of loneliness to go away.
A prayer answered is highly cherished. Aspie doesn't need a dozen, a handful or even a few. Every Aspie craves one person in this alien world to be able to communicate with. It seems like such a small, small request...but it's near impossible to accomplish.
It's hard to see and hear others doing this, going there, engaging in that....when one was not born with the mechanism or know how to inquire, to speak, to exchange pleasantries, share a joke, go out to eat.
I used to kinda talk down about my son who had just the one friend...hmmm, now I get it. Now I understand why one friend can mean so much.
Because that was all he needed to feel good about himself and his place in the world.
One friend cures loneliness. That simple.
Friendship is such an enormous gift. I wish I knew the secret formula
Must be feeling rather isolated, locked in.
I mean, some, probably most have family members available,that care or that they can count on. I don't...haven't for years...but I do remember what it was like.
Hmm, I used to have a half dozen people's I could drop in on, call or see a movie with. Damn, just guess I felt like suffering tonight. Damn, that was probably the best thing about my immediate and extended family. Someone cared, someone wanted to talk with...sometimes even asking for advice or my Opinion. Wow...why did I give that up again? At this moment that seems like heaven.Damn. Something just isn't working for me. Frolicking in the depths of despair. Remembering...wondering...
I know I'm not the only one
I just wish I could make me and every one who feels like this better..because god its awful.
Nothing like pouring my heart out at 5am
I wonder if anyone knows I'm here

3 comments:

  1. Yes, that one friend makes all the difference. Thanks for writing this blog.

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  2. Now that I've found this blog, as I go back through old posts I try to promise that I won't become The Pest that comments on every entry. lol But as I read this, WOW do I get this. Just ONE person, the RIGHT person, that truly gets you... That's it. That is all we need. But I guess, for us, that's a tall order.
    When I had friends, it was always one very close friend or relationship at a time. Looking back, this may have been part of why they ended. If said friend or boyfriend invited me along with their other friends to do something or to meet their family, I wouldn't go. I wasn't intending to snub their friends, I just couldn't cope with the group dynamic. I'm better one on one. If they went without me (which I encouraged them to do so they wouldn't feel chained to me) they knew I would be sitting alone because I had no other friends. Though I never intened it to be, it was probably a lot of obligation on their shoulders. :-(
    You know.... I wonder if there is a place for quirky folks like us to pal (or e-pal) up...?
    Thank you again for this blog. You're really helping people! We know you're here!!! :-)

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  3. Hey KatKnip, comment as much as you like! I enjoy hearing what other people think. Yes, the one friend theory has been a common theme throughout my life. I am either someone else's one and only or alone.
    Lately, seems like the one friend, though still physically present, isn't meeting the old needs.
    I was thinking about my ex husband just today. He and I were everything to each other, went everywhere, talked and shared. Every day was quality time. Now, after almost two decades with the same person...yeah, things change. Maybe I need to revise it to a two friend theory. One isn't quite what it used to be.
    My biggest dreams, hopes and wishes continue to revolve around finding that one really good friend. Hmmm, I rarely acknowledge my hopes and wishes...but it is true.
    Thanks for writing:) Amy

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