Here's what I've learned:
The child always comes first ahead of my needs. If my son needs something, for me to listen or to help, I stop what I am doing. Yes, it's a no-brainier, but with my loops and monorailic trains of thought, this can challenge me.
My son eats healthy meals at regular intervals. It doesn't matter that I eat erratically and the same exact meals everyday. My child needs a variety and is always served a main dish, fruit or vegetable, milk or juice and sometimes dessert.
I compliment good behavior and work at building on his strengths and minimizing his weaknesses.
I lead, teach by my example.
I am generous with love and affection.
I am honest with my child regarding my autism. If there is some activity that I cannot do because of my Aspergers, I explain it to my son, in terms he understands.
I've taught my son that there are times I cannot speak. He has learned my various hand gestures so we can communicate. He is aware that I sometimes cannot talk and drive. My up raised hand is his signal to wait. Hugs and handholding reassure him that even though I cant speak, I am listening and there for him.
I correct and talk about negative behaviors and again, I lead by example.
I forgive indiscretions and have taught my sons to do likewise.
If we are both hungry, I make sure he eats first. If there is one sandwich, he gets three fourths. That's what being a parent means.
I make sure he gets outside, exercises and plays with other kids, as much as possible. It does not matter that I would rather lay on the couch or don't feel well. His needs come first.
I am teaching and learning about consequences of actions.
I stand up for my sons against teachers, school systems, rude and mean people All the Time!!! They know momma will always fight for their rights and their well being.
I say what I mean and I mean what I say, I Love my children:)
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