When you leave a 20 year relationship with a 12 year old you raised together and there is no alimony or child support.
Anytime I fill out forms for government assistance, I'm asked if there is child support. Today applying for Healthcare was no different. And it got me thinking.
This is yet another huge red flag, warning sign that I was in a bad relationship. See, most parents, the non narcissistic, healthy parents, would ensure their child was taken care of, but not here.
It reminded me that the relationship was based on me playing second, always being less than her, someone to shit on and kiss her ass. As long as I was willing to be her second, her dump shit she doesn't need or want, happily grateful for the crumbs...the relationship worked because it met her needs exactly. Things only started going downhill when I'd try to be her equal which upset the balance of power and control. That's what destroyed the relationship...me asking to be treated like a hunan, an equal. Her answer was hell no, of course. She needs to maintain some hierarchical higher ground to keep her fragile ego stoked. She needs someone weaker to manipulate and control.
Yeah, things get so much clearer from a distance. And yes, I deserve so much better.
Anytime I fill out forms for government assistance, I'm asked if there is child support. Today applying for Healthcare was no different. And it got me thinking.
This is yet another huge red flag, warning sign that I was in a bad relationship. See, most parents, the non narcissistic, healthy parents, would ensure their child was taken care of, but not here.
It reminded me that the relationship was based on me playing second, always being less than her, someone to shit on and kiss her ass. As long as I was willing to be her second, her dump shit she doesn't need or want, happily grateful for the crumbs...the relationship worked because it met her needs exactly. Things only started going downhill when I'd try to be her equal which upset the balance of power and control. That's what destroyed the relationship...me asking to be treated like a hunan, an equal. Her answer was hell no, of course. She needs to maintain some hierarchical higher ground to keep her fragile ego stoked. She needs someone weaker to manipulate and control.
Yeah, things get so much clearer from a distance. And yes, I deserve so much better.
