Wednesday, September 14, 2016

I did the most amazing thing today

When I opened my mail this morning, I was shocked to find a notice from Social Security saying they were taking away my monthly payments starting in October.my balance was above the required $2000 limit. I immediately began to panic. I called the phone number and a woman callously explained the why to me. I started to cry as I hung up. My boat was sunk.
I went to my bank to get the paperwork needed to reinstate my benefits for November. I ended up going twice because I need additional statements.
Then I did the unthinkable, the extremely difficult. I drove my stressed out butt to Albany, a foreign-to-me city 15 minutes away. All the streets were unfamiliar and I had no sense of direction so I felt perpetually lost and wasn't as all sure I could find my way home and in time to pick up my son from school.
Thanks to maps on my phone, I found the Social Security office. Then I waited fidgeting and languishing in my seat for my number to be called. I had info that said I was under my limit but I wasn't sure it would actually work.
When my number was called I presented my info to the worker. I explained the situation and almost immediately she said, "I can fix this."
Of course I didn't believe her so I watched her type and type away. Minutes dragged by. Then she said everything was going to be fine. My checks were reinstated and I'd receive a notice in the mail stating that.
I almost fell over. Instead, I thanked and started crying with relief on my way out the door and to my car. I was just sobbing at the fact that I has figured out exactly what to do, and in the midst of full blown, autistic flapping panic, I accomplished the impossible.
I was able to navigate home with time to spare.
I went from heavy grief and belittling myself for making a stupid, costly mistake to congratulating myself on fighting through the panic, gathering the appropriate evidence and presenting my case in a somewhat calm manner.
I won!!! I won against SS!!! I didn't crawl in a corner and feel sorry for myself, I fought to get things turned positively around!! And it worked. I worked. I did it.
What a rollercoaster, emotional day.
After I calmed down a bit, I realized that every time I doubt myself, God gives me a little challenge to prove that I can handle and deal with unexpected, challenging situations.
Really, I need to start believing in myself more. Look at the mountains I've accomplished just in the pat month. Maybe if I believe in myself more I won't need these challenges.
A job very well done!!!!

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