At my son's IEP, Individualized Educational Plan, yesterday, it was reported that his teachers said he was doing well in all his classes. On one ocassion, little guy lost his homework, started battling with the teacher and then serendipitously found someone else's paper to claim as his own. He thought this a great and fortuitous event. Boy, does he remind me of the other adult in the former household. I can't help but think that YL lies and tries to get away with stuff just like OA, other adult, routinely did.
YL is learning that he can throw a childish fit and it won't cause him to get out of a chore...no more temper tantrums to get attention and whatever he wants. He is unlearning alllll the negative messages he received and believed in that dysfunctional household.
The unkindness there was thick, profuse and subtle. I was to take the blame for everything. If she wanted to lose weight, I had to cook better. If the creditors were beating down her door, I needed to start using coupons. I Kid You Not. She had no sense of personal responsibility as it was always someone else's fault. It appears my son inherited these character flaws.
She elevated herself by being portrayed as a benevolent ruler who bestowed countless gifts to her subjects...whatever piece of free propaganda from the human society or veterans group, whether it be a cheap tote to a pair of thin gloves, she was always so pleased with herself to have a serf to give this worthless crap to...like she was doing me a favor.
So, my son is slowly becoming untwisted and less self-absorbed. He's not constantly trying to get away with stuff, rather, he finally has a healthy, active example of an adult parent to model himself and his behavior after. I'm extremely pleased to see him becoming a kinder, gentler, more caring like his momma guy. I can only envision him improving the longer he has a positive role model every single day. He is doing Great!
