My visit to the veterinarian with my sick puppy today, epitomized the angst and discomfort of trying to communicate in a neurotypical world.
I walk in and shown to an exam room with the comment, "the vet will be right in." Moments later a woman in green enters. Must be the vet, I'm thinking.
The woman starts asking for information, symptoms and whatnots. I answer to the best of my ability. I realize that I have no idea who this woman is. "And your name is..." and she answers, "Ann". Okay, I've got a name but I don't think shes the vet as a vet would have said "Dr. Soandso." I work to remember back to my previous visit there about a year ago.
"Oh, you are the vet tech?"
"Yes," she answers.
Okay, strike one for me, in my head anyway.
After the initial intake in walks the vet. Even though I'd never met her before, she doesn't introduce herself. Now begins the stress and confusion.
I seem to be unable to clarify that my dog isn't eating anything at all. She spouts suggestions I already know and have tried. She suggests something called "omni diet" or the like, to see whether my dog has allergies and sensitivities, at 57$ dollars a bag for 8 weeks. First off, it took us about 20 minutes to get to the fact that omni diet is a specific brand of dog food. I couldn't tell whether she was suggesting a diet that I cook and feed her, or whether it was a series of lab tests. No, it ended up being a brand of dry dog food.
As I'm asking her about this omni diet, I'm not understanding which of the different things it is. Is it something I cook myself or lab tests. I kept trying to get answers by repeatedly asking what it was and she repeatedly gave me looks like "I have no idea what you are talking about? Or "Why aren't you understanding this?"
Yep, she looked at me like I was the idiot girl who just crawled out of the woods. The look on her face, hurt. I couldn't make her understand that I had no idea what she meant. She couldn't believe I wasn't able to get it.
Sigh.
I wanted to bawl. I felt the frustration tears coming but I managed to hold them in. I free elr terrible; i mean, i was doing everything possible to help my sick puppy but i was sounding my wheels in a puddle of scum.
I couldn't give up.
The vet prescribed two different meds. After she had told me to give no food to my dog until morning, the vet tech is showing me the meds and stressing how they Both Need to Be Taken with Food!!!
Um, HELLO, I'm confused as Hell. After saying it aloud a few times, "okay, vet said no food, meds say with food, after tonight", I start repeating it in my head because such a blatant contradiction caused this Aspie to put everything else on hold and fixate on this egregious, nonsensical anomaly.
I get the tech to demonstrate administration of both meds as one, some freaking adjustable syringe, is a brand new contraption.
I continue to ask questions hoping to clarify the vet's instructions. I stop asking when the look on the tech's face matches the "she's an idiot" look of the vet. I want my dog to get well but I'll just have to do the best I can with the information I can remember.
I can only endure feeling humiliated and stupid for so long.
I left.
Sigh.
Why yes, i am emotionally compromised and self medicating. I have no intention of leaving the house anymore today. I've had enough. I've had enough.
Some days are like this. Minor autistic hells were by the wish to communicate far outweighs the actual ability to do so.
I'm just, like, going to bed, covers over my head. Sigh
I walk in and shown to an exam room with the comment, "the vet will be right in." Moments later a woman in green enters. Must be the vet, I'm thinking.
The woman starts asking for information, symptoms and whatnots. I answer to the best of my ability. I realize that I have no idea who this woman is. "And your name is..." and she answers, "Ann". Okay, I've got a name but I don't think shes the vet as a vet would have said "Dr. Soandso." I work to remember back to my previous visit there about a year ago.
"Oh, you are the vet tech?"
"Yes," she answers.
Okay, strike one for me, in my head anyway.
After the initial intake in walks the vet. Even though I'd never met her before, she doesn't introduce herself. Now begins the stress and confusion.
I seem to be unable to clarify that my dog isn't eating anything at all. She spouts suggestions I already know and have tried. She suggests something called "omni diet" or the like, to see whether my dog has allergies and sensitivities, at 57$ dollars a bag for 8 weeks. First off, it took us about 20 minutes to get to the fact that omni diet is a specific brand of dog food. I couldn't tell whether she was suggesting a diet that I cook and feed her, or whether it was a series of lab tests. No, it ended up being a brand of dry dog food.
As I'm asking her about this omni diet, I'm not understanding which of the different things it is. Is it something I cook myself or lab tests. I kept trying to get answers by repeatedly asking what it was and she repeatedly gave me looks like "I have no idea what you are talking about? Or "Why aren't you understanding this?"
Yep, she looked at me like I was the idiot girl who just crawled out of the woods. The look on her face, hurt. I couldn't make her understand that I had no idea what she meant. She couldn't believe I wasn't able to get it.
Sigh.
I wanted to bawl. I felt the frustration tears coming but I managed to hold them in. I free elr terrible; i mean, i was doing everything possible to help my sick puppy but i was sounding my wheels in a puddle of scum.
I couldn't give up.
The vet prescribed two different meds. After she had told me to give no food to my dog until morning, the vet tech is showing me the meds and stressing how they Both Need to Be Taken with Food!!!
Um, HELLO, I'm confused as Hell. After saying it aloud a few times, "okay, vet said no food, meds say with food, after tonight", I start repeating it in my head because such a blatant contradiction caused this Aspie to put everything else on hold and fixate on this egregious, nonsensical anomaly.
I get the tech to demonstrate administration of both meds as one, some freaking adjustable syringe, is a brand new contraption.
I continue to ask questions hoping to clarify the vet's instructions. I stop asking when the look on the tech's face matches the "she's an idiot" look of the vet. I want my dog to get well but I'll just have to do the best I can with the information I can remember.
I can only endure feeling humiliated and stupid for so long.
I left.
Sigh.
Why yes, i am emotionally compromised and self medicating. I have no intention of leaving the house anymore today. I've had enough. I've had enough.
Some days are like this. Minor autistic hells were by the wish to communicate far outweighs the actual ability to do so.
I'm just, like, going to bed, covers over my head. Sigh
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